“Socha nahi tha zindagi mein yun milogi… milke bhi tum na meri ho sakogi…” I was humming while pacing up the stairs of the hospital… as always I was late for my appointment…

When I entered his room the doctor was waiting for me… it has been years since I started consulting him… for some people ageing is a myth… he looks the same through the many years I have known him…he had already got all my medical reports & was going through them… with a smile on his face he told me I am good to go…

My eyes all welled up… holding on to my test results I thanked him & the Almighty for His grace… I stepped out of the hospital & into the street…

I started walking through the park… the trees & the greenery had a newfound colour to it… I could enjoy the freshness of them after years… the chirping of the birds have become music to my ears again…

A kid, maybe just 2 years old, was playing nearby… suddenly he tripped & fell bruising his knees… he started crying… I ran towards him & picked him up… his face seemed all familiar to me… I was trying to stop him crying when his mom came running… her face was more than familiar to me…

Those eyes have always mesmerized me… the black mole under her lips… I can never stop loving it… I could never stop loving her…

A great friend of mine from college… we were very close after the college days… we never knew when we crossed the lines of friendship… we could never be apart… I could listen to her for hours… just gazing at her mole…

That’s when I got to know that some part of my brain was growing faster than it should… I couldn’t let her know… she would die faster than me… sometimes you have to do what is right even though your heart aches against it… I decided to grow apart from her… I had to become a cheat to drift away from her… I cheated her & myself… she thought I never loved her… she walked away from my life…

Now I am holding her baby… could have been ours… the look in her eyes told me she has never forgiven me… she took the kid from my hand & walked away without even sparing a second glance…

When I wanted to live my doctor told I would die… & now when he told I would live I want to drop dead…