College days… the most beautiful days of anyone’s life… Sitting in the class… listening to the lectures… the most boring thing in life… pretending to pay attention to the class… I was walking through my memories… all she gave me was memories…

She had stolen my heart the very moment I saw her… a new admission in my school… tall, with chocolaty eyes & a cute round face… she came & sat in a bench near mine… I tried to talk to her… she shied away from me…

Slowly our friendship grew… those were some of the best days of my life… I couldn’t spend a day without talking to her… I finally decided to open my mind to her…

It was a rainy day… I was standing in the portico of the school… she came & stood beside me… opened the umbrella, giving me the chance I have been waiting for… we walked slowly through the rain… she was silent & I was humming the tune “mazhathullikal pozhinjeedumee naadan vazhi…” suddenly I blurted out “I love you…” she stopped dead in her tracks…

She was stunned… I searched her eyes for an answer… she turned away from me & started walking… leaving me rooted to the ground… alone… in the chilling rain…

I was broken… she never spoke to me after that day… she slowly faded away from my life… years later… sitting in this class… those memories still choke me…

The lecturer was racing through the topics… I was least interested in what was being discussed in the class…

My eyes were searching for her… a good friend of mine… she was busy writing the notes… she looked really cute concentrating on the frantic movements of the pen… my gaze was stuck in her eyes that were chasing the pen…

I have always wondered… can love happen twice??? I guess I really like her, nothing more… I am afraid… I don’t want to be hurt… I don’t want to lose a friend… again…

The bell rang… waking me up from my thoughts… she got up to leave… I packed my bag & started after her… her long hair swung from side to side as she walked… soon I caught up with her… we started talking about random things… she kept chattering non-stop… & her smile was tearing my heart apart… what the hell… I LOVE HER… I can no longer lie to myself…

But I kept mum... buried my feelings deep inside my heart… & smiled…

We reached the gate… she walked towards her cycle… & me towards my bike… she waved me goodbye... my heart ached… I kept looking back at her till she was out of sight… but she never even spared a glance…

Some feelings are best kept silent…